


I Need This

by Pixie (magnetgirl)



Category: Star Trek: Discovery
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, F/M, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Torture, Implied/Referenced Underage Sex, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-25
Updated: 2018-05-25
Packaged: 2019-05-13 13:01:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14749367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/magnetgirl/pseuds/Pixie
Summary: BlackQat requested Gabriel Lorca vs Mirror Lorca +six deadly wordsprompt 19:Finally killing you set me free.





	I Need This

**Author's Note:**

  * For [BlackQat](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackQat/gifts).



> In which Mirror Lorca is a truly terrible person. Takes place sometime after season one, but the reports of Mirror Lorca's death were premature.
> 
> To differentiate between the two I use "Gabriel" for Prime and "Lorca" for Mirror.

"Get up."

Gabriel doesn't rise, doesn't move. An outside observer might mistake it for an act of will, but resistance was beaten out of him ages ago. He doesn't move because his will is lost.

"I said get up."

Gabriel flinches at Lorca's kick. The pain barely registers anymore. It used to be a relief, the physical torture so much better than the rest. His doppelgänger is a genius in cruelty. He's been forced to choose other prisoners' fates. To eat people. To watch this twisted version of himself drag women into his bed. He'd lost his voice screaming the first time it happened. Lorca had been turned on.

"Come now, Gabriel, we have a visitor. Someone special."

He pulls Gabriel to his feet, slaps his cheek. Lorca's eyes are bright with anticipation. It's a look Gabriel's seen in the mirror and he tastes bile in his throat.

He's dragged into the main room, somewhere between a banquet hall and a torture chamber and dripping with Lorca's dark aesthetic, like something out of gothic fantasy. When Gabriel first saw it he thought of vampires, an idea more apt than he ever imagined. Lorca has sucked the lifeblood out of many with his sadism.

As the door opens to reveal their guest, Gabriel steels himself not to react. 'Someone special' could be any number of horrors. A prisoner of war set to be flayed. A girl far too young to be part of Lorca's sex games. A familiar face destined to haunt his nightmares.

As if every waking moment isn't already a nightmare.

Katrina walks in and the whole universe twists again. She's the last person he wants to see, her memory the last vestige of normalcy, of sanity, left to him. He'd prayed she was never here, her star too bright for this hell. But there she stands, shrouded in black and gold and the rage that fuels this place.

She locks eyes with Lorca. "We heard you were dead." It's her voice and not her voice. Pitched lower and harsh, her tone flatter than he'd ever heard his Kat.

Lorca raises an eyebrow. Exactly as Gabriel would. Exactly as he _has._ He digs his fingernails into his hands so as not to cry out.

"And you believed it?" Lorca drawls. 

Her lips curl and they laugh together without cheer and close the gap between them in a sudden, violent, rush. His hands are on her body, his lips at her neck. She cries out, seemingly in pain but here pleasure sounds the same. Lorca curls his fingers into her hair, pushes her up against the wall, and Gabriel gasps as memories collide.

Katrina's eyes flicker toward the sound and go wide at what she finds. She freezes in place and color drains from her face. With a strangled cry she shoves Lorca away and stares, shaking, at the twin behind him.

". . .He's--"

Lorca chuckles as he moves back to circle Gabriel. "Me?" She swallows, unable to respond. "No, he's nothing like me." He returns to her side, snakes his arm around her waist possessively and taunts his other self, equally unresponsive. "Say hello, Gabriel."

Gabriel doesn't answer, doesn't move. He's white as a ghost, and his stomach churns violently. Lorca chuckles again.

"This is going to be fun."

He rips Kat's sleeve off, revealing scars running up and down her arm, a criss cross pattern of what passes for passion. Gabriel wants to look away but he's frozen in place. As he watches unblinking, Lorca pulls a knife from his boot, slides it across her skin, his eyes dancing and hers --

_Familiar._

Lorca raises the knife, sneers at Gabriel as he prepares to pierce her flesh, add a new scar to the sleeve, but something he sees pass between them makes him pause. He twists his hand, thrusts Katrina away, holds the knife out towards her chest.

She raises her chin and the illusion falls away.

"Admiral," Lorca murmurs, not without respect. Few people can surprise him and she's pulled it off more than once. In a simpler story, they'd be a great team.

She purses her lips. "You're supposed to be dead."

He shrugs. "So were you."

They move as one, pulling phasers up and pointing them at each other, bookends of betrayal. Gabriel blinks, mind racing at the tableau before him, and not quite able to take it in. Silence swirls around them, finally broken by another chuckle from Lorca.

"Come on, Kat, tell the truth." He leans forward, leering. "I'm the man you really want."

She pulls the trigger before he's done speaking, a bright glow fills the room as the beam hits him square in chest. Lorca slumps over, she drops the phaser into its holster and runs to Gabriel, calling his name.

"Gabriel!" She wants to wrap her arms around him in a tight embrace, but he's pulling away so she stops and lowers her voice. "Look at me." She steps towards him with deliberation, replacing his view of Lorca with herself. "You're safe. You're safe."

He shakes his head, closes his eyes tight, afraid to believe anything she or they are telling him.

"You're safe," she says again. "I'm here. I'm real."

He opens his eyes, meets hers, wide with compassion, like nothing he's seen in years.

". . .Kat. . .?"

"Yes." The word is a breath. A lifeline he'd given up finding.

He touches a hand to his chest. "Mm-my -- Kat?"

 _"Your_ Kat," she asserts, and holds out a hand. "I'm taking you home."

He reaches slowly, tentatively brushes her fingers. She feels solid. His eyes travel up to her arm, the scars, and frowns.

"A disguise," she explains, "to trap. . ." She stumbles over the name, doesn't want to call the monster by Gabriel's name. "We heard he was plotting."

"We?"

Kat shakes her head. "It's a long story." She bites her lip. "I thought you were dead."

"Me too," he answers in a whisper. She curls her fingers around his, in comfort, but he flinches and steals away. She steps back to give him space and his eyes fall to Lorca's prone body.

"Is he. . ."

"Stunned," she answers and starts to move in his direction. "I have to put on the restraints."

". . .What," Gabriel asks with no inflection, not a question so much as a half formed sob.

Kat closes manacles over the prisoner's hands. "We're taking him back." Starfleet wanted to punish him for the _Buran_ — and to pick his brain about all the battles he'd won for them. They needed him to prove he'd used them, tricked them. It turned her stomach, the desperation to wash the blood from their hands. But she needed to be the one to bring him in. She had demons of her own to excise. "He'll be interrogated and then imprisoned."

"No. . .no. . ."

"Gabriel--"

He slaps away her proffered hand.

"You can't!"

"He'll be under guard. He's a war criminal in two timelines, he'll never be free."

Gabriel shakes his head furiously. "He'll escape -- that's what he does!" Lorca had regaled him with countless stories of his exploits. If even a tenth were true he was too dangerous to be left alive. "He knows too much," he tells her, "he'll kill everything I love, everything I _am_ \--" His wild eyes beg her to understand. _He already has._

"Starfleet--"

" _NO._ "

She starts, as if slapped. He pulls the phaser from her, too quickly for her to react from distraction.

"No," he repeats and raises the phaser to hold it on Lorca's unconscious and restrained body.

Katrina's breath catches in her throat, her chest tight, blood pounding in her ears. She reaches a shaking hand toward the gun.

"Gabriel, that's not who you are."

"You don't know who I am."  _Not anymore_. He'd been here too long, seen too much, and none of it is allowed to follow her home. His grip tightens. 

_No Starfleet officer could survive that universe alone._

Kat blinks at tears. She found him alive, but not whole.

"You're Captain Gabriel Lorca," she tells him with conviction and resolve. "You're my best friend." She steps closer, touches her hand to his cheek, tears slipping down her face freely now. "I love you."

"He'll _kill you_!" he roars, pushing her away.

"I can take care of myself—"

" _I can't._ "

He wilts with the admission, his voice cracked, eyes drowning in pain. The phaser trembles. She places a hand over his to steady it.

"This won't help."

He shakes his head, weary, lost. "You don't know-"

"I do," she interrupts to assure. "I know." How it feels to lose everything and choose violence. She meets his eyes. "I know too well."

Silence grows as they share a long look. They have a lot to talk about.

The phaser lowers and she slips it out of his hand, resets it to stun and puts it away. He watches, lips pressed with tension, but nods when she's done, and reaches out to take her hand.

"I agree with your Gabriel."

Their heads whip around at the voice, the former Emperor, now reluctant Starfleet asset, casually leaning against the door. Kat wonders how long she's been there -- she heard nothing, but that's normal for Philippa.

Gabriel's eyes flicker to Katrina's, questions dancing in them, but she responds with a small shake of her head. It's still a long story, and they need to focus. His eyes narrow but he nods acceptance, and she almost smiles. She's reaching him. 

" _My_ Gabriel is a cockroach," Philippa continues, and walks with purpose towards them and Lorca, starting to stir on the floor. "A pest. Hard to kill. And worthless."

She raises a phaser, points it at Lorca's head and looks to her companions. Kat looks from Philippa's smile to Gabriel's pleading eyes and her resolve wavers.

Lorca's eyes flutter open to find Philippa flanked by the Terran Pretenders and pointing a gun at his head. She's working _with_ them.

"I always knew you were weak," he scoffs.

She drops suddenly to the floor, picks up Lorca's abandoned knife, and presses it against his neck. The phaser buried in his belly and the restraints on his hands make him immobile, and the knife's position prevents him from even spitting in her face.

"And I always knew you were nothing," Philippa replies and slits his throat with one flick of her hand.

Katrina sways in place, it's over before she can really begin to react. Beside her, Gabriel draws a sharp breath. Philippa drops the knife, stands, and walks back toward the door. She seems almost bored, though Katrina knows better.

A long moment of silence and stillness passes, each with their thoughts.

Finally, Gabriel turns away from his own dead body to Kat -- _his_ Kat -- and breathes a deep sigh of relief. Her eyes search his face.

"We should go," Philippa calls from the doorway.

Katrina nods, gives his hand a tentative tug as she turns to go. He entwines his fingers with hers and follows.

"Let's get the hell out of here."


End file.
